Thursday, June 18, 2009

BEAUTY aint the BEAST...


I went over to The Most Fraudulent Visited Urban Website In The World MediaTakeout land and this is what I had to deal with...

Mother got daughter addicted to Botox? She introduced her daughter at 18 years old. Why the hell would your daughter need botox at 18? It's a hard knock life I guess...

This kinda shit is the result of taking your looks too far. You look like a chopped and screwed version of Ashford and Nicole Richie. Be happy with what you were given.

EBT Network strikes AGAIN



EBT needs to wake the fuck up. It's bad enough they have shows like College Hill where bitches never fucking go to SCHOOL (I know I'm not the only one who noticed), then they have 106th&Park riding off of their dwindling teenie-bopper fan base to survive, to add it all together they are like a wannabe MTV. Now to top it off they are trying to be like Bravo.

What the fuck is this supposed to be? The real ghetto housewives of Westside ATL?
These girls need to be worrying about how to patch their careers together and act like grown women. Not flaunt their yaki on my t.v. screen (you know I aint really got cable) once a week.

ATTN BET:

People only watch you for the following shows: Keyshia Frankie nem (you know what I mean), Baldwin Hills, College Hill, Judge Karen/Hatchett, and reruns of The Game.

Get your SHIT together.

When I realized hip hop was still dead...



I know this is all fun and games. But seriously....SERIOUSLY? They wonder why gimmick rappers are the only ones selling these days. The music is a fucking joke!

Gahh..my eyebrows are touching again.

Hello My Apple



I was browsing over at Freddy O's blog and found a story about an up-and-coming young lady named PRISCILLA RENEA who I absolutely love! I love her style, she is absolutely refreshing in the current culture of pop music with all the autotunes, synthesizers, and people that like to grab every A-List rapper/singer to make their singles happen (which T t turns me off).

Priscilla Renea has built a youtube fanbase of thousands with her beautiful craft. She writes, sings, and plays the guitar. The picture you see is of her performing at a club in ATL.

Her current single "Hello My Apple" is currently available on Itunes and you can follow the yellow brick road for more flicks. THANKS FREDDY!

DIDDY TOLD YOU IT WOULD BE HARD


There is nothing like a closeted homosexual super-mogul's scorn. Or at least that is what I saw on Day 26's Diddy's nutbather's twitter page yesterday. I was traveling over to dlisted for my morning joe when low and behold I stumbled upon this tramautic story.


Aubrey O'Day was left without any clothes today in Los Angeles -- and this time, it wasn't on purpose.

O'Day tells us she was robbed this morning while on her way to film a segment for the TV Guide Channel. Aubrey says she was walking down an alley near the building when "someone ran behind me and stole everything I was holding" -- including an expensive dress by designer Zac Posen.

Left without a proper outfit, Aubrey says she was forced to wear whatever the TV Guide people had handy.

There is one silver lining to the whole ordeal: Her beloved teacup Maltese named Ginger escaped unharmed -- her makeup guy was holding her.



Gosh this woman stays busy. When she isn't tooting her tittaybawls up for the camera [we love you Heff!] or trying to piece her music career back together, she is walking to do blue collar work. Interesting. Wasn't this the same girl they said demanded a cab to be chauferred to and from the NOH8 campaign shoot? I guess TVGuide power is REAL!

JAMIE FOXX IS MAD AND HE ISN'T TAKING IT ANYMORE!!




I thought by typing the title in capital letters you'd really get the full effect. Jamie Foxx recently took a stab back at a bartender who sued him in April of 2007. According to the TMZ report, Jamie hosted an event at Social, an L.A. club where the bartender fell on a bunch of broken glass and ended up injuring himself, resulting in 170 STITCHES!!!

I blame it on the goose! Patron would never do this...

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

We Fall Down...

I would finish the song, but it doesn't apply here. The following audio you're about to witness is rather lengthy, but it is an interview of Charlemagne, aka Wendy William's ex foot soaker and Krispe Kreme's courier going AWF about R&B princess (sorry I didn't want Diddy to come after me) Cassie.

Cassie has been swallowing Diddy's raw nut for so long now and still hasn't got an album release date or an official single? While she is shuffling through Day26's recyclables (sad aint it?) figuring out which one looks pretty she needs to take the clit piercing out and walk like an Egyptian right out of Diddy's efficiency apartment he bought her up over yonder in Harlem.

The girl needs to learn no one is gonna buy the cow if they get the milk and cookies for FREE!
(Mmm...my stomach growled AGAIN)
Fool me 1nce shame on you...
Fool me 2wice


Follow the yellow brick road for more fuckery

E-Taquanda phone HOME

This is why I don't look up at the sky. Well, this and I don't want bird shit ruining my retinas...


Usher no wanta dem gay sex tapes ta leak mon

Don't ask me wtf is going on with my faux-patois title there I am craving cheetos and zoning out listing to Pres Obie flap his newport suckers on my tv. ANYWHO

E Online has just released information about Usher's recent filing for divorce from wife (the verdict is still out on that) and baby mama Tameka Foster. I remember back when Usher was confessing I just knew he was going to make a followup coming out cd. He is one of the finest ugly brothas I feasted my eyes on in a LONG time, Chilli was fine ass hell too! I would sweat her baby hairs out.

However something seems a little fishy about this I got over on E :

Tameka Raymond very well may have been a loyal wife. Just not since last summer.

According to divorce documents filed by Usher on Friday and obtained today by E! News, the couple has been separated since July 2008—meaning that while he is seeking a divorce nearly two years after getting married, he and his estranged missus logged a mere 11 months together as husband and wife (loyal or otherwise) before going their separate ways.

"The marriage between the parties is irretrievably broken," read the documents, filed in Georgia's Fulton County Superior Court.

"There is no reasonable hope of reconciliation."

That's one opinion. Wonder what the detectives apparently hired to trail the singer think…

The "Love in This Club" singer is seeking a full rundown of all documents his missus has kept during the course of their marriage, which began when the duo tied the knot in a quiet civil service Aug. 3, 2007.

That includes tax files, paycheck stubs, bank account information and other financial records, insurance policies, real-estate rental agreements, medical records and automobile registrations.

On the more personal—and potentially acrimonious—side of things, he's also seeking copies of "notes, cards, letters, photographs, film, documents, tapes, voice recordings, gift, jewelry, clothes" or other evidence that reflects on Usher's conduct during their marriage, as well as detective reports, photos or recordings that have resulted from either "surveillance or investigation" of her onetime better half.

The latter request seemingly brings credence to rumors that Raymond had hired a private detective to trail Usher during their time apart.

Making sure no stone is left unturned—or potentially leaked to the media, no doubt—he's also requesting copies of "any and all diaries or personal notes kept…during the course of the marriage."

Finally, Usher is asking for joint legal and physical custody of their two sons together, 18-month-old Usher V and 6-month-old Naviyd Ely, saying the tots "are substantially dependent upon each party for support."


I just knew I shouldn't have let him burn. When he was with Chilli he was all good, but when he started slippin and slidin inbetween Mr. Tameka's hamhocks and gravy all HELL broke loose! I wonder if they did a sex tape!? I wonder if Usher is the top or the bottom. Anyhow, DETECTIVE SURVEILLANCE AND PHOTOS? OMG. She pulled a Michael Strahan on that ass!

In the end I just hope this isn't a scheme to get more gas for his upcoming album since the last one kinda flopped. Although after the breakup with Chilli he came back STRONG! Team Usher>>>Trannyka Foster ANYDAY!

When White folk touch Black News

Why does it seem like whenever black/latino people are nearly done with a trend white folk are always the last to know? LOL. I love my melanin challenged brothas and sistas don't get me wrong, but shit like this just makes my eyebrows touch. I was over at my girl (in my head) necole bitchie's house and saw this NY Post blog:

"Just like rappers sample other singers tracks, Kelis has taken it upon herself to sample Rihanna's new peacock do. And in true remix style, she's thrown way too much at the original, totally destroying what made it popular in the first place.

Kelis has had some problems of late, so it's understandable that she's distracted. What I can't comprehend is why anyone would let her out of the house rocking a BlueRazz milkshake on her head. Not cool guys, not cool."

http://blogs.nypost.com/popwrap/archives/2009/06/kelis_spunky_smurf.html


WTF? Where have they been? Obviously sleeping on Kelis, she is an innovator and an originator in a league of her own. Rihanna has never done anything original in her fashion forward life. She is beautiful, she looks like a model, she gets songs w/ great productions, I'll even go as far to say she holds a tune decently. What I won't allow is this foolishness to spread. Kelis has had Rihannas look 2 x before we even knew Rihanna had an umbrella (eh eh eh eh)

Some will say "how do you know the author was white scoops, it's a fucking op ed". Bitch I know it because my balls tingled and I had a strange craving for rice cakes and shit. How about that?





Lil Wang Edition: Are all the GOOD black women whores too?




Just the sight of this tattooed, tarantula-faced, swamp thing makes me want to lean to the right and dry heave for a good five minutes but I will be strong for YOU! So recently up and coming actress/model and "This Christmas" star Lauren London (who am I fooling, you know her as that aspiring thug misses NeNe from T.I.'s movie "ATL") and singer/songwriter Nivea [wikipedia is your friend too!] both confirmed that they were 6 months pregnant with Lil Wang's children.

I remember when Lauren came out she said she was a classy lady and not like the average aspiring black actress/model and she wouldn't stoop low to sleep her way to the top. Nivea on the other hand has never been scared of her inner hood chique since she parted ways with producer The Dream a few years back.

It got me to thinking. I hear so many black women talking about no good men this and no good men that. When half of the time even if you are a good black woman you fall for deadbeat ass dudes. Who is letting Lil Wang fuck them raw? (besides the obvious!) these rappers travel from city to city, fuck girl after girl and you women who are supposed to have self esteem and dignity are going to drop your panties and throw your legs back for a traveling dick provider?!?

Now you got 2 different babies, 2 different mamas, birthday probably gonna be at the same time. One daddy that refuses to marry and build a house before playing house.

When will the Obama effect take presidence over your pussy cravings?

Mario can't get enough of Burger King

I was migrating over at one of my favorite blogs, http://freddyo.com/ , and found a little dilly about one of the young R&B underdogs of our times ... Mr Mario Barrett!!



He is super talented, handsome, respectful, and seems to really have his head on his shoulders. Mature beyond his years perhaps due to his upbringing.

According to the article, Mario has signed on to do 6 free shows on the "BK Fam Fest" tour hosted by comedian Kevin Heart. The events which take place in 6 cities are going to be 8 hour days of family, food, and fun! Arts and crafts, building a whopper (*stomach growls*) and obviously live music! Burger King will even donate money to a charity at each of the six sites!

Go 'head Mario! He is always doing something for kids/charities. Philanthropists>>>

On a sidenote most people go bald to show off their heads, please stop wearing hats it messes up the whole look.


Click HERE for more

Mariah Carey-"Obsessed" aka D.O.G.M (Death Of GOOD Music)

I will make this my first "material thread" and I have to say I am so disgusted with the current state of mainstream r&b music. There are not many songs I think I will be able to take from the 2000s into the 2010s or 2050s for that matter. I feel like people are settling for the formulas that work right now instead of music that is TIMELESS.

Exhibit "A"








WTF Mariah? Don't get me wrong, the production is great. The vocals. Autotune and MARIAH? One of the greatest voices of our times is dipping into autotune? It may work for Lady Gaga, or Rihanna, or someone of that calibur, but MARIAH CAREY?

Don't let me start on the lyrics (3...2...1) but wtf? "Why you all up in my George Foreman?"
I tolerated you with "These chickens is ash and I'm lotion" in 2005.

This takes Mimi to a whole new level of sonic fuckery proportions! You are a 40 year old married woman making a response to a disstrack created by a psycho rapper ex you try to deny? Maybe if a teenie bopper was making this I could understand, but you sound FOOLISH on this track. WAKE UP! I hope to God Whitney doesn't bring this mess on 9/1/09.

Scoop is the NAME!

Hey ladies and gents!

Welcome to The Press Fire aka TPF. I go by the name of Scoop in the blogosphere and this is my first "blog" ever. What I hope to bring to the forefront is urban entertainment news with a twist. Now hear me out, I have a dual personality [please don't sue me Sasha Fierce] I love gossip, but I also love real news. I don't want this blog to be like all the others constantly talking about Rihanna, Beyonce, Chris Brown, and whoever else "has the biggest cock" at the time.

Things you should know about me

-Highly sarcastic
-Brutally honest
-Not easily entertained

I'm hoping to bring a different twist to blogging about celebrities in the urban (who the fuck am I fooling.. BLACK AND LATINO) communities by giving it to you from all perspectives. I want this to be a place you as a reader can come to as an escape for a good laugh for a good cry and a deep thought.

This doesn't mean I'm gonna be perfect my first go-round, but at this point I'm open to suggestions, and light criticism (just don't hurt my feelings because I will find you and beat you like you stole somethin!)


--Scoop